TO MY FOREVER FRIEND

People often say you can't choose your family, but no one talks about the rare moments when family becomes the friend you would have chosen anyway.

We moved together to the same city, as I was searching for greener pastures and you were pursuing your college certification. Life in the city wasn’t as smooth; we slept hungry sometimes, but we always knew how to have a good time with the little we had. We knew how to make the best out of everything,’ Sisi ni Maskini jeuri,’ a phrase we constantly used and laughed our hearts out when we knew we were living beyond our means. Looking back, those were terribly good days.

You have been my constant, through the bad and the good, and I can never thank you enough. I remember calling from work to share the news that would change everything. I couldn’t bring myself to say it outright, but you guessed immediately. “What have you decided?” you asked, your excitement barely contained.

“I’m keeping it,” I said.

And you shouted, “I’m going to be an uncle!”

It was the sweetest thing I have ever heard anyone say. You even told me you’d dreamt about it, and we laughed at how absurdly crazy you were going, trying to figure out who could have had your baby and never told you. From that moment, I knew you would be an important part of my son’s life.You have lived up to that and more. The way you spend Saturdays playing football with him, or how you change your T-shirt to match his, those are the moments that will live in my heart forever.

I would want your wife to be my friend. What an odd way to begin a statement, I know.

But let me explain.

Being friends with your wife would mean getting to see you regularly, inviting you for barbecues, and having game nights on the porch. Maybe it’s a far-fetched dream, but it’s a dream nonetheless. You know how we’ve always imagined becoming wealthy one day, and how we hope our bond will last for generations.

To most people, you are fun-loving, an adrenaline junkie, and nothing fazes you. But to me, you are the most selfless person I’ve ever known, a heart of gold, pure and kind. If I were to count the people who’ve truly impacted my life, I’d say, without hesitation, that I’m honoured to call

you my friend, even when you’re annoyingly impossible.

We went to the same junior boarding school, and you were the most mischievous. Somehow, because of our parents, I ended up taking care of you. I was three classes ahead, and I used to wash your clothes. Despite being the smallest in the whole school, you managed to be the cheekiest, constantly getting us both in trouble. I was the sidekick to your show.

Then came our teenage years, different high schools, different paths. We didn’t see each other often, except on Holidays; we were busy figuring out who we were becoming.

But as young adults, we found our way back to each other. I would say we became friends in our young adult, when I was done with college and you were done with high school. I remember taking an interest in fitness, and I wanted to do morning runs, and since you were available, I literally forced you to go on runs with me. Despite you being very small, I would ensure I had woken you up each day. I think that we have mastered the art of expressing love without words. You constantly say that I introduced you to fitness, but for me, I gained much more by having you as a confidant.

The same year I had my son was the year you almost lost your life. You had an accident because you were skating carefree through a residential street. And as you tried to navigate between a road tractor and a personal car, you skidded under the tractor, and in less than a second, a 40-inch-tall wheel with a diameter of 22 inches was pressing through your chest as it moved. And before you knew it, you were up on your feet, shocking everyone around you," Tulikuwa tunajua umeenda," [we knew you were gone] they said. How does someone survive being run over by a road tractor? It was nothing short of a miracle. You walked away without a scratch except for being unsettled and a bit a tear on your skating shoes.

I remember you calling hysterical and saying that at that time, you had surrendered to death. There was no way you were surviving that. But you did, you felt like a cushion was placed over you. God truly protected you, a testimony that will forever last.

The thought of losing you was impossible to fathom, a pain I can’t even put into words. And what did I do? Scold you for not being careful—typical aunty behavior.

We’ve grown up together, watched each other evolve into functioning adults. You’ve been there through every chapter, when we slept hungry, when we went on runs, when I got my first job, when my boss was unbearable, when I moved houses, and when you graduated. We were figuring out life side by side.

Not many people are lucky enough to have something like this. Even in my lowest moments, I always knew you would come through, no questions asked. You paid my rent more than once, and not once did you complain or treat me any differently. You never made me feel small or indebted. The little you had; you were always willing to share. That kind of selflessness is rare, and though I can never repay you, I hope that throughout our lives, I can be there for you in the smallest moments that are treasurable to you.

We had similar childhoods but grew into two very different adults: you, the fun-loving one; me, the serious firstborn daughter. Yet somehow, we balanced each other perfectly. If I were to bet on someone who knows me best, it would be you.

You’re that friend you never realize you need until you have them. They say blood is thicker than water, but the world keeps proving that isn’t always true. Our friendship wasn’t built just because we share the same blood; it endured because we chose each other, again and again.

If I could describe the love I have for you, I’d call it unconditional, but since I know you’d argue about the word, I’ll settle for this: it’s impeccable.

A forever friend is one of life's greatest gifts.Who is yours ? Share a memory in the comments, tag them if they're here, or send them this story as a reminder of how much they are appreciated.